


Heartbeats and Gravity

by VulpesVulpes713



Series: Fictober 2018 [14]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Asexual Keith (Voltron), Comfort No Hurt, Established Relationship, Fictober 2018, M/M, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, True Love, klance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 17:28:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16580888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VulpesVulpes713/pseuds/VulpesVulpes713
Summary: Prompt:“But if you cannot see it, is it really there?”





	Heartbeats and Gravity

He’s always harboured suspicious over love.

If one could fall into it.

If it could last.

If it could be shared, or given, or taken away.

If it existed.

And even now, after years spent in space surrounded by the people he’d come to call friends, Keith is hesitant.

He loves them, sure. But it’s different.

It’s not the same.

And he’s petrified that his version of love-his understanding of it-will never be enough for someone else. That he’s too broken for it. Too conflicted. He’d grown up with varying levels of love, and after his father died, any lingering traces of it had fled. Abandoned him, just like the mother he’d never known.

And sure, he’d met Shiro, and  _thought_  maybe he loved him. But again, it’s different. It’s familial. And aside from that form of love, Keith lacks much experience in anything else. Anything…greater.

He doesn’t know if it’s possible for him to feel love in that way. He doesn’t know how.

And it’s what has him lingering outside of Lance’s door one night, unable to sleep, plagued by apprehensive doubts about this thing called love.

Lance opens the door, questions unspoken on his lips. But he must see the look in Keith’s eyes, as he invites him in without a word.

Keith moves forward, sitting on the edge of Lance’s bed as his mind grapples with the conversation he’s about to attempt.

It’s a tough one. Probably the hardest he’s considered trying.

But he needs to know. He can’t continue to shower Lance in affections he’s been ignorantly calling love if that’s not really what they are. After all, one can only pass off hail as rain for so long before getting hit in the head with ice.

So he takes a deep breath, and asks his first question.

“Lance…do you love me?”

The answer comes right away, without a doubt. Sans hesitation.

“Of course.”

Keith nods, moving on.

“And…what does love mean to you?”

There’s a longer pause this time: in which Lance stands still in the center of his room for a moment before coming to sit at Keith’s side. Keith focuses on the floor, but he can see Lance’s arms move in his periphery before he feels them wrap around his shoulders.

So he’s prepared, at least, for the embrace that follows.

“What’s going on? Are you okay?” he asks, but Keith doesn’t answer. He sits still, waiting, wondering, worrying…and finally Lance sighs in understanding. 

“Love to me means spending time with the people I care about. Seeing them smile, watching them grow…It’s this happiness that blossoms in my torso and warms my hands and makes my cheeks turn red. It means being around my friends…with you…doing nothing at all except sharing the same space.”

Keith hums as he contemplates that. It’s a good answer. A touching answer.

It’s a Lance answer, is what it is, but Keith can’t let himself relax just yet. Not when his own doubts are spikes on his ribcage: piercing his sides with each breath.

Because what Lance just described makes sense. Keith feels the same way, but it’s more of that familial love. He could use that same definition Lance just gave on any of his friends. And if that’s all love is, this… _sense_  of community with the people around you, then maybe Keith doesn’t have to worry about lacking in it.

But still he’s anxious. He  _feels_  that there’s more to it than that. He’s  _seen_  that there’s more to it, between Hunk and Shay, Shiro and Adam…in the way his mother speaks about his father, despite him being gone.

It’s love, but it’s so much more. Keith can sense it. He knows it’s there. And the look that crosses over the eyes of those who speak of their own love is different from when Pidge talks about Matt, or Allura with Coran. And  _that’s_  what has Keith worried.

Because…what if that look doesn’t exist for him? What if all that there is for him is that same familial love? There’s nothing wrong with it, sure, but for Lance?

It’s not enough.

It could  _never_ be enough. And Keith wouldn’t dream of withholding Lance from a true love scenario. So he needs to know.

“Can…” he tries, but his voice grows wobbly as his own emotions threaten to take over. But he pushes through it nonetheless. “But what about me? Does is change when it’s me?”

Lance inhales thoughtfully, and Keith glances over at him when the response is slow to come.

 _It doesn’t,_  he thinks, but when he looks at Lance’s face he changes his mind. The expression he wears is fond, and his eyes are soft as they gaze up at the ceiling in deep thought.

_It’s that look…!_

And when Lance speaks it’s with a smile, which has Keith re-evaluating his previous speculations.

“To me,” Lance begins, keeping his stare upwards, “ love is more than a feeling. It’s this…. _sensation_  I get in my chest whenever I see you. Like, my heart is laughing whenever you do, and it hurts when I see you in pain. To me, love is a bond between people. It holds them close, makes them more aware of everything in the world.”

He looks down then, catching Keith’s gaze in his own.

“But with you…it’s stronger than just that. It’s like, I hear your voice, and my mind focuses in on every word. It’s louder than the others. I’m more aware of it. And the same goes for everything else. Your presence when you enter a room, the way your breathe at night, your footsteps in the hall…it’s all unique, and no matter what it is, I can always tell it’s you. My heart is in tune with yours, maybe.” He shrugs, squeezing closer to Keith’s side.

“And it’s different than the love I feel for Hunk, or my family…it’s…well not  _stronger_ , just…different. Like, if I lost one of them, and I pray that I never do but-” he sighs sadly, resting his head against Keith’s shoulder. 

“If I lost one of them, I think I would survive it. It would be awful, and terrible, and probably the worst thing in my life, but I would live. But…if I lost you…well,” he lifts his head, reaching out to take Keith’s face in his hands and turning it towards himself. Keith is swallowed in watery blue eyes, dimly lit by the shadows in the room, but vibrant and all-consuming. He stares into them, sinking deeper into their hold.

“If I lost you Keith,” Lance whispers gently, fingers warm and safe, “I think I would die. My heart would shatter, like the explosion of a star. I wouldn’t be able to go on. Because I love you. I love you so much that my life would mean nothing if you vanished from it.”

And Keith has to remind himself to inhale. His lungs burn, but it’s the sting of unshed tears that has him ducking his head. Lance’s hands trail down his cheeks, resting on his shoulders as he leans forward, back into Keith’s space.

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he mumbles, and Keith shakes his head.

“You didn’t, I just-” he bites his lower lip, ready now, to ask the big question. The one he’s been struggling with for years. He breathes in, holds it for a second, then releases it in the form of words. “Does that kind of love really exist?”

Lance blinks, but his eyes never leave Keith’s face.

“I think it does,” he answers without pause, “because I feel it. Every day. Every second. I feel it.”

“How?” Keith presses, unsure as to why. Maybe he can’t bring himself to believe it so easily. There has to be some explanation, some instructions he can follow. “How are you sure?”

“I just am,” Lance replies with a soft smile. He’s patient, more so than Keith deserves. Especially because he doesn’t grow upset when he sees Keith’s doubts expressed so plainly on his face. “It’s…hard to explain. But I know it’s real, and it’s there, and it’s _powerful,_  because my soul ignites when I’m with you. And nothing else can make me feel so…so  _secure_  and-and like I’m floating in a space above reality, heart filled to the brim with these feelings towards you. It’s magical. It’s wonderful, and scary, and unpredictably constant, and words could never be enough to describe it! But it’s  _love,_  Keith. It’s love.”

He wants to stop there. Lance’s words are beacons of light in the haze of Keith’s mind, and he grasps onto them with a determination. But he can’t stop. Can’t because, no matter how eloquently Lance presents his explanations, there’s something missing. That _proof_  that Keith hates that he needs. But he asks anyways, because he can’t stop.

“ **But if you cannot see it, is it really there?** How do we know that sort of love isn’t just some chemical reaction that makes us crazy for a bit and then fizzles out? What makes us so sure that it will last? How can it be real?”

Lance stares back for a long moment, pondering. Then he lays down on the bed, gesturing for Keith to follow when he’s met with a confused tilt of the head.

“Come here,” he instructs, patting his chest, “and listen.”

Keith does, and settles his ear against Lance’s chest as he holds his breath.

And he feels it more than hears it at first: that gentle rise and fall of torso filling with air. But then the soft echo of a pulse pushes through, and Keith closes his eyes to better focus on the sounds of Lance’s heart.

“Do you hear it?” he’s asked, and Keith nods. “That’s the sound of my heart, pushing blood around my body. You can hear it, and you can feel it working, right?”

Again, Keith nods.

“But can you see it?”

Keith opens his eyes, sitting up slightly to stare down at Lance. Because he knows where this is going, but he answers nonetheless.

“No, I can’t.”

“But you know it’s still there, right?”

Another nod.

“So it’s real. Now look-” Lance leans over, grabbing a pillow from off his bed and promptly dropping it off the side. “Did you see that?”

“Yes…”

“The pillow fell because of gravity. We know because we could see the result, but did you actually  _see_ gravity? No. All we see is the reaction to it. Gravity exists. It’s around us, but we don’t see it. The same with the air. It’s here, we breathe it in, live in it, but we can’t see it. Not on Earth anyway,” he adds with a chuckle, pulling Keith back down to his side. “Do you ever not believe in those things just because you can’t see them?”

And Keith sighs, breathing in Lance’s scent as he shakes his head.

“Well, no…”

“I think the same goes for love,” Lance murmurs, running his hands through Keith’s hair. “It’s something we feel, experience, react to. Maybe it’s even more complicated than that. Love is a mystery, as they say. But it’s there, all around us, whether we choose to believe in it or not.”

A kiss is pressed to Keith’s forehead, and he smiles as he feels his muscles relax. Lance’s words are soothing. They always have been. But it’s the banishment of Keith’s doubts that have him sinking deeper into the mattress beneath them.

He knows now. He can relate to what Lance is saying. He thinks he understands, and he knows that if ever there comes a time that he feels lost and unsure, Lance will be there, to help guide him through.

_Maybe that’s love. Or maybe it’s just Lance._

“But, you know,” Lance continues after a moment, shifting on the bed so he can properly hold Keith in his arms. “If you need me to, I can  _show_  you my love more often. As proof, like taking a breath, or dropping a pillow. I’ll show you that my love is here, and you’re in it. I can kiss you, and hug you, and tell you how much you mean to me if you’re in doubt. Because I love you Keith. I love you so much, and I’m not afraid to show it-”

“I know,” Keith chuckles, cutting Lance off as he snuggles closer. “I know. But I wasn’t doubting you, Lance. I was more…doubting myself. I wasn’t sure if I was capable of loving the same way you were. I wasn’t even sure if that sort of love was possible.” He closes his eyes, twining his fingers with Lance’s. “But now I know.”

“Oh…?”

Keith tilts his head up, pressing a quick kiss to Lance’s lips as he sighs contently into the night.

“Yeah. It’s the same as you said: my heart belongs to you. Every breath I take is for you. Every word…every thought. I just needed to know that what I was feeling really was different, and not like…some  _illness_  or something.”

Lance laughs, jostling Keith’s head as his chest bounces up and down.

“You’ve always been a romantic,” he jests. “But you know, maybe love  _is_  an illness. Some infection we get that we can’t ever get rid of. We become hosts to this parasite that feeds off our emotions and makes us grow closer and closer until we share the same heart.”

Keith frowns, grunting.

“I liked your other explanation better.”

Lance snorts at that, touseling Keith’s hair as he grins.

“Then let’s go with that one.”

“I love you,” Keith says in response. “I really do.”

“I know. I never doubted for a second,” Lance smiles, chest rising and falling, pulse loud in Keith’s ears. And it’s just as Lance said: he can hear it. He can feel it. And even if he can’t see it he knows it’s there. He’s here,  _in_  love. Wrapped up in it. Has been for a while now. And it’s as sure as the air he’s breathing, the pulse in his throat, and the weight on his body as Earth spins on its axis.

It’s as sure as Lance’s arms holding tight around him, skin warm and body close.

It’s love. And Keith finally welcomes it into his life. Officially. Without hesitation. It’s here, and he believes it. He’s capable of it. He can do this. He can  _love_  and be loved, the way Lance explained.

It’s real, and Keith eagerly falls into it, not knowing he’d already jumped.


End file.
